Wednesday, December 14, 2005
Tuesday, December 13, 2005
I had my first experience with the holiday variety of the Boston Pops over the weekend, and it is an understatement to describe it as a frenzied assault of Christmas insanity.
Holiday Pops is a necessary evil that accompanies the opportunity to sing with the Boston Symphony Orchestra on actual pieces of real music. You want to sing Stravinsky, Beethoven, Mozart and Mahler? Then you have to sing the Pops' "Sleigh Ride" 15 times, and put on Santa hats while swaying on stage to the Christmas Sing-a-long.
What's amazing about the whole affair is the frenzy the audience is whipped into over the course of an evening. They start off dressed in their nice little Christmas sweaters, sitting at their tables ordering a drink or two.
Then the insanity begins as inane arrangements of Christmas song after Christmas song (with repeats!) are blared into their faces by a stage full of musicians who could not look less excited. After a few more rounds of drinks, the audience reaches intermission, hungry for more...
After another few rounds of drinks, another 20 minutes of crappy music, and prodding from an overly enthusiastic conductor, Santa walks in mid-song. Symphony hall experiences a collective climax of screaming, flailing and pawing at ol' St. Nick. Even certain members of the chorus (who shall remain nameless) can't refrain from waving at Santa as he enters.
After Santa leaves, the entire audience is easily convinced to join in the sing-a-long as the conductor takes a wireless mic out into the crowd to be mauled by drunken women shrieking the chorus of "Jingle Bells". And once the sing-a-long is over and the audience has raucously demanded an encore or two, they finally walk out of Symphony Hall onto Mass Ave, strung out and wasted.
So there you have it. I just saved you between $50 and $200 by summarizing an experience at the Boston Holiday Pops complete with helpful visual aids.
An early Christmas from me to you!
The Bitch Is Back
For some reason I've been absent from these pages for a while. Some say it's the monotony caused by the never-ending ridiculousness going on these days (read: The "War on Christmas" frenzy, endless Alito business, & The White House doing their thing). Still others claim that I've lost my edge, that I don't have the same kind of lateral movement in the open field, or that I've lost something off my fastball. I, however, prefer to go with the simplest route:
I'm fucking lazy.
Sure I've been busy here and there with various projects, trips to New Haven, working actual 8 hour days even. But the long and short of it is that I just stopped having anything to say that was even mildly serious for a good while.
But, as the title so states, the bitch is back. Hopefully.
So to tide you over if I never return again, here's a lovely bit from craigslist that I found:
Things you do for your dog when you love her